Lust is not Love

		

Some of life's greatest lessons are counter intuitive. Growing up I always believed the ultimate in an interpersonal relationship was love. Now those exact words didn't exist, but the thought process was the same.

Some men select a bride because she has pretty eyes, some because she has pretty hair. A man once married his bride because she could sing. On the morning after their marriage, when he saw her without any paint or powder on, and saw a part of her hair on the dresser, he looked at her and said," Sing, for hell sakes, sing!"

Eric Fromm, renowned social psychologist explained that sexual desire is in the minds of most people and is associated with love. As such, they are easily mislead into confusing love with physical desire.

In a previous blog (Abigail the Monster) I explained that love is not the end goal, it is the beginning of the process. If love isn't the starting point, your ending point will most assuredly be anything but happiness and joy.

Couples often fall in lust thinking they are falling in love. Being physically attracted to each other is very important, but sexual combustibility is a short fuse and a spark.

The 5-year itch is a direct result of falling in lust. Falling in love requires action of a different nature than sexual prowess. Lust is temporary satisfaction, love can be eternal.

Love requires effort and patience and can be the epitome of passion. Lust is passion run amok. It is the elimination of boundaries and leads to broken hearts, broken marriages and pain.

Don’t Say “I Do” until you Read These

		

1. "How To Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie

This is a timeless piece of literature. Mr. Carnegie weaves stories, anecdotes, and wisdom from the ages on how to get along with people, business associates, clients, and family. This book introduces you to the importance of asking questions before rendering judgment.

2. "The Anatomy of Peace" by The Arbinger Institute

Jim Ferrell and his staff have written an incredible book on developing relationships. Arbinger has developed a language of their own and it's sweeping the nation. Learn what it means to get 'Out of the box' and how to stay there. Every husband, wife, mother, father, and in-law needs to have the tools found in this book.

This is a preview of Don't Say "I Do" until you Read These. Read the full post (252 words, estimated 1:00 mins reading time)

Brad Buckles & Lance Armstrong 100miles

		

Brad Buckles & Lance Armstrong - Livestrong 100 miles!

Sunday 6/21 Fathers Day LIVESTRONG Challenge Seattle 100 Miles around and thru Seattle Washington

LET'S GO, Brad Buckles-Seattle!

I need your help, support & any fundraising possible. Even if it is a dollar. I don't care. If I can spend Fathers day riding 100 miles, you can help me with a few dollars. It is for cancer, it is in the name of my Mom. She has, is enduring breast cancer. I have cancer in my direct family. I have experienced, second hand, this disease.

Please help any way that you can :)

Brad Buckles Riding a GT Carbon frame (for those that ask) I am looking forward to this race/fight on Sunday!!!

Here is a LIVESTRONG posting from thier blog.

Show us your spirit! SEATTLE ROCKS!

The LIVESTRONG "Show Us Your Spirit" Rally is underway! The 'prize' is a City message and 'tweet' from Lance Armstrong, but most importantly: bragging rights over the other LIVESTRONG Challenge cities in terms of who has the best spirit!

What do we need to do? For the next two weeks, up to May 7, 2009, we need to raise as much money as possible, and bring on as many new participants as we can!

I KNOW that as the newest – and first – 2009 event city of the LIVESTRONG Challenge Series, that we can also be the first in registration and fundraising!

Let's compare the other Challenge Cities (this is where we throw down the gauntlet)

What does Austin have? Longhorns? "Hook 'Em"? What the heck does that mean? What does Philly have? A cracked bell and humidity? Rocky? Cream cheese? What does San Jose have? High tech? Heat and earthquakes?

... but ...

What does Seattle have? Clean air, snow-capped mountains, the ocean, lakes, hills, forests, a huge cycling and running community, and an amazing group of LIVESTRONG people with big hearts and relentless fundraising energy!

(Call me biased.)

The excitement is definitely building on all sides! The course route is set, the weather is getting warmer – but we need you to put Seattle on the LIVESTRONG map!

We welcome all Seattleites and out-of-towners to this great event, and LIVESTRONG Challenge participants will enjoy an unforgettable event! The course will take advantage of all aspects of Seattle – from starting under the Space Needle, to riding through downtown, to closing off a floating bridge for the riders, to taking in the beautiful lakes, hills, mountains and forests that form our topography. This truly will be a unique, fun and challenging ride.

So, go ahead, Seattle! Let's pick a fight with cancer!

Let's show Austin, Philly and San Jose who really is number one!

Let's put ourselves on the map! Sign up for the Challenge in Seattle, and FUNDRAISE, FUNDRAISE, FUNDRAISE!

Gooooo, Seattle & Goooo, Brad Buckles!

Bridal Show convention in Minneapolis (BSPI)

		

This week I have had the opportunity to attend and help organize one of the greatest gatherings in the wedding industry.

60 Bridal show producers, representing hundreds of bridal shows, from all over the world have come to gether to discuss the wedding industry. Everything is on the agenda from bridal trends, fashion, marketing and of course the economy.

The best minds of the industry have indicated that although there are drastic changes in the industry this year, brides are getting married and they are "JUST" booking later in the year than in times past.

www.bspishows.com www.andyebon.com

More to come,

Brad Buckles

THURSDAY nights a great night to have marriage ceremony, have a reception!

		

According to many brides and wedding professionals that I am talking with lately. Thursday night is becomming the new Saturday night, most important wedding day in demand.

Facilities have the date open, always. Wedding professionals are always open and willing to make it worth your while if you would like to book them. And it get the party started before the weekend really starts. For brides, you can affor to take a day or two off and enjoy a little honeymoon downtime before friends have to be back to work on Monday.

It will become much more popular in the months to come. We feel the need to spread the information as fast as possible because we are here for you...Always.

Brad Buckles

Want to say "I do" on St. Patricks Day?

		

Brides have been known to say "I do" on St Patricks day, at least the Irish ones. Valentines is not the only romantic holiday out there.

There are many couples out there wanting their significant romantic dates to be honored, experienced and remembered by holidays that they can remember and celebrate year after year.

We also find wedding dates such as 7/7/07 and 8/8/08 to be very popular as well.

"As the years go by it will be interesting to see what brides come up with" says Brad Buckles, Tradeshow Producer for the Tacoma Spring Wedding Expo at the Tacoma Dome.

"This is a great place for brides to see what the trends are"

Getting started-Familiarize,Fantasize,Prioritize, Visualize,Organize,Sympathize,Synchronize,Deputize

		

Bridesclub.com vendor listing - We're here to help! Check us out!

Weddings are a ceremony! A Celebration! One part reality and planning. A HUGE part fantasizing, dreaming, hoping and orchestrating.

We here at bridesclub.com are trying to bring to you the latest and best vendors in the field of wedding planning. Tips and trends, the newest in wedding services.

We want to inspire you with wonderfully innovative ideas to personalize your wedding celebration. First things first: What do you want? FAMILIARIZE yourself with the options and available services. FANTASIZE about all that can be. PRIORITIZE which points are important to you/your significant other. VISUALIZE what it is going to look like as it comes together. ORGANIZE it into smaller pieces. SYMPATHIZE - although it is your day, others should to be able to enjoy it. It is a celebration/party. You want others to enjoy it with you! SYNCHRONIZE your dreams, cultures, abilities to come together. DEPUTIZE your team! Who can you really rely on! Write down all of your thoughts on a piece of paper and start. You'd be surprised with what a little creativity and knowledge can bring you.

....and remember to ENJOY LIFE!

The Choice Is Yours, In Reality and In Life - ENJOY IT!

		

The Choice Is Yours, In Reality and In Life - ENJOY IT! I made the decision early last year to enjoy life. To not let anything get to me anymore.

I meet tens of thousands of brides every year at the Tacoma, Bellevue and Lynnwood Wedding Expos and over in Hawaii at the Hawaii Bridal Expo. I challenge them constantly to enjoy the process. Enjoy life!

We are all a great big family. At a wedding we participate in this reality by celebrating the uniting of husband and wife. We get together and we throw a big party as a family.

The last several months have awakened me! Im sure that it is safe to say we have been nervous, worried, and little scared about all the changes and uncertainty.

But I choose to be inspired, Why...? I look at this time to celebrate a new dawn. The coming of change.... whatever the outcome. We need to turn to each other, talk to friends, and families - we're all part of several families and "friends are the family we choose for ourselves". Celebrate the differences in yourself and those around you. Enjoy the life you are living and those you are living it with!

May we all be grateful for what we have and celebrate by sharing even more.

Enjoy Life!

Calendar of Life...8/8/08 or 7/7/07 what about 6/6/06?

		

I guess I find it curious while I read columns regarding getting married on 8/8/08. As if getting married on this day will make it "more" special or give you "luck"...?

As I continue to watch I suppose my perspective is different. Brides/Grooms, people, human beings are always looking to leave their mark, kind of like "blogging". Everyone wants something special, unique and different

After being married 18 years, I realize the "special" dates are things that surprise you. That is what makes them special. You don't have control over the day your son was born...2/4/93 or 5/25/95. How about the day that you closed on your first home 6/13/95. Should I have closed on 5/5/05 ?

These are the dates that are special to me because they caught me by surprise. The date of the month is not special, what happened on the day is special. It definitely changed from the way I intended on spending the day. I believe it left a wonderful mark on my calendar of life.

In a world of trying to "make" things special I guess we sometimes loose perspective of what is special. We also end up creating things that we become victims of... like brides getting married on 6/6/06.

Some things to consider when picking a wedding date

		

Here are several important things to consider when choosing a date. First, sit down together to determine a priority list. (You both may want to include your families in this conversation, especially if they live out of town.)

The honeymoon: Consider the type of honeymoon you both want. For instance, if you are both sun-worshipers, don't plan a wedding date when your favorite island is experiencing monsoon season.

Work schedules: You both may have work periods when you can't take time off. Select a date when your lives are least demanding.

Holidays and family occasions: Some couples go out of their way to schedule a wedding over a three-day weekend, so everyone has more time together. This idea works best if you send invitations at least eight weeks in advance; otherwise, people might already have plans. ..Consider that traveling MAY be more expensive during holidays, too.

Day of the week: Saturdays are generally the preferred wedding day. That way, out-of-town guests can easily stay overnight. Weekday dates result in some regrets regrets but may offer more availability at some locations or with other wedding professionals

Alternate dates: If possible, have a first-choice date and at least one backup date.

Once the couple decides on a date, the real fun can begin! Work backward from the chosen date to determine a time line of what needs to be done when. Some tasks, such as mailing invitations and picking up the rings, obviously can't be checked off until two months before the Big Day. On the other hand, you both want to take care of other items -- booking a florist and reception site, for example -- and attend a Wedding Expo, at least a year in advance.

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